10 year mile marker
So this weekend i’m on break from ESP to celebrate my 10 year anniversary with my partner Jess 🙂 We have booked some time away and are going to enjoy some time to ourselves with the Granny’s taking care of Vida while we are away. A lot of people have congratulated us over the past couple days and the very first question to leave their lips is “How have we kept it going for so long?”
There can be doubt about how challenging it is to try and keep a personal relationship in an industry that places so many demands on your time but it certainly helps that we are both in the entertainment fields perhaps thats why. We realize we are in the business of entertaining people and that in of itself it requires discipline, not just with ourselves but also with our time. When we first got together i made it clear that music will always be an important part of my life and that she can be a fickle mistress. Long late hours or playing and longer hours preparing for gigs and traveling is part and parcel of that package. Its a tough thing to deal with a constant basis.
It means that i don’t maybe spend as much time with friends at the club and that most get togethers exclude me because i work such strange hours. Most of my buddies don’t even invite me anymore because chances are I can’t make it! So I prefer to just drop in unannounced when I get a chance. Doesn’t mean I don’t love my friends, just that my wife and child are the focus of my time now-a-days. And thats ok. My mates (hopefully) accept that as part of what i do and, in order to have some modicum of success there are sacrifices that need to be made. I’m sure my friends feel that acutely. But when you have a family of your own, you want to be with them. And after losing my parents i value my family even more.
If you want something to work you have to put the time in no matter how touch the circumstances. I play 2-4 on a Sat night. I’ll sleep for an hour or two before i play so i can feel rested and give 100% when i perform. When i finish i get home and crash till around 10am. Not much sleep granted but that time with my girls is very important to me 🙂 so i make it work. So i guess what i’m trying to get across is you have to find out what makes you happy and managed the limited time we all have to make them all work together, and most importantly find someone out there who understands what drives you and lets you have the space and time you need to do what makes you happy. Its seemed to of worked for me thus far.
Happy 10 year Anniversary Jess! Here’s to the next 10 🙂